How To Be More Interesting

Posted on 10/14/2009

Don't complain. I admit that complaining is fascinating for the person doing it. But it is almost always uninteresting to the person hearing it. In any social gathering the people who seem most interesting are the ones who do the least complaining .

Don' be confused by the way some very entertaining people can manage to turn complaining into a form of high amusement. If you are not a professional late night talk show guest, don't complain.

Don't take a long time saying things. Again we get confused because we think that fascinating people have a lot to say. But if there are two people and they have the same information to convey, the one who does it in the fewest words will seem more interesting.

Don't have grievances your partner doesn't have. We have all got grievances.

Don't talk about yourself. I know this is one's really hard. Why, just the other day i found myself .....whoops. You see the problem. It is hard not to talk about yourself. But let me suggest an alternative. Talk about your partner. Just remember don't complain and you will seem fascinating. In any case, talk about anything but yourself as much as possible.

Don't talk about the same things all the time. I know we all get fascinated and obsessed and absorbed by certain topics like the endless ways your boss has proven he is a jerk. Okay. Your boss is a jerk. You talked about that once. Just make sure that the next thing you talk about is not your boss. If you can just avoid repeating topics, you will do fine with this.

Don't talk about things your partner is not interested in. Now this may be hard because you may not be interested in the things your partner is interested in. But all i say is that you will seem a lot more interesting every time you talk about things that touch on your partner's interest. Even better, learn something about what your partner is interested in.

Don't talk about things that aren't interesting.

Don't say the same old things. Say something surprizing to the person you love.

Don't forget to have things to look forward to. New things are always interesting. The more new things in your life, the more you will be interesting to each other.

Don't forget to ask questions. Any question that is a sincere attempt to get information or learn something new and not an attempt to play gotcha will make you seem more interesting.

I don't want to make this sound like too much of a hurdle. Lets not forget how real life can be a love killer one way is that it makes it hard for us to have the energy to be interesting. But if you remember these don'ts and add them to your life bit by bit and make small changes, then you will go far toward digging yourself out of the low-expectations trap.

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