Kiss Me

Posted on 01/10/2010

Who could deny the pleasure of a well executed kiss? Soft meets soft, the personal space bubble opens its doors, the guard is let down. Kissing is about as close as you can get to another human being without removing your clothes .

The romantic tingle of a kiss is undeniable. It conveniently steps in and fills the space of unspeakable passion, as Ingrid Bergman told us when she said, “A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.”

The Romans thought so highly of kisses that they had several words in their Latin lexicon to describe the touching of lips: an osculum is a friendly kiss applied to the cheeks, a basium is a kiss planted with a bit more affection, and a suavium is an ardent kiss reserved for lovers.

Some theories say kissing evolved out of our ancient need to “sniff out” strangers, much the way animals do. (Is this why Eskimos rub noses in greeting?) Animals spend the majority of their time sniffing around; in the process they receive massive doses of olfactory and pheromonal stimulation.

Back when humans consciously sniffed each other (we still do it, but not as overtly), we also engaged in a subtle exchange of breath. This exhaled air is sometimes called the mana, an invisible representation of a person’s deepest self, Edwin Dobb writes in Harper’s magazine, “Kissing was considered the only unmediated way to mingle souls, and no manner of lovemaking could be more intimate or more consequential.”

Mingling of souls aside, kissing provided our ancestors with clues about other people what they ate, the state of their health, their personal hygiene or lack of it. In the quest for procreation, kissing was, and still is, a way to rule out undesirable mates.

You wouldn’t make babies with someone whose breath was full with disease, would you?

Researchers have found that couples who kiss frequently have stronger relationships and more satisfying sex lives than their non kissing peers. Kissing boosts feelings of security and well being, and displaying and receiving affection can strengthen the immune system.

Sex educators advise couples to “use all five senses and even your brain when you kiss.” But a kiss becomes more complete and ultimately more satisfying when we also take into account the subtle presence of the sixth sense.

Shakespeare called sex “a madness, most discreet, a choking gall, and a preserved sweet.” Who hasn’t experienced soul stirring sexual chemistry or the tapping of feisty deep inside the brain?

Being in love is like drinking a miraculous elixir, one that makes you feel younger, more alive, more desirable and attractive.

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