Love Exercises

Posted on 12/24/2009

Love exercise 1. Charting the map of love.

Make a list of every part of your body where you like to be touched. For each indicate :

Where you want to be touched!?

• When: before making love, during, after?
• How: lightly, firmly, playfully slapped?
• With what: hands, lips, tongue?
• What I want you to do and the order in which I want you to do it.
• How this will feel to me if you do it right

Exchange notes with your partner when you have completed this list. Then, using your partner’s notes as a map, explore your partner’s erogenous zones one at a time. If you have any doubts, ask your partner for precise instructions to help you. You need to know how your partner wishes to be touched, what is pleasurable, sensitive, and creates the greatest arousal.

Tell your partner how it feels to touch and be touched. Take your time.You may not get to all the items on each other’s list. You can go back to what you missed another time. Give specific advice. Be helpful. Take turns.

It is important to be a good teacher. Be encouraging, patient, appreciative and willing to allow the exercise to progress to the point where the two of you are both involved. It is also important to be a submissive and willing pupil. So practice and study are recommended.

Love exercise 2. What Excites Me!?

List everything you can think of that arouses your sexual interest. This can include seeing your partner silhouetted in a certain light, the smell of your partner’s hair, being nuzzled on the neck while standing on line at the movies.

In completing this list, focus your attention on your senses. What sights, sounds, smells, tastes, touches give you pleasure? Don’t worry if you sometimes feel aroused by a person other than your partner. Every man and woman who is sexually alive is attracted to other people.

This does not mean that you want to become involved. It is merely a sign that you have vital sexual energy. You need to know all of the things that excite you so you can bring this excitement into your relationship. For each item on your list indicate:

- What you find sexy about it and why.
- How you can include more of this in your life together.

When you have completed your list, share it with your partner. Talk about your needs. How often are these needs fulfilled? Are you free to show these needs? Are you willing to satisfy your partner’s needs? If you and your partner changed places, how would you go about pleasing him or her?

Talk about the ideal experience that would arouse this person. Have you ever had this experience? If so, why not have it again? If not, why not create it?

Love exercise 3. Express Your Romantic Feelings.

Anytime you feel aroused or in the mood, share the feeling with your partner. You should not expect anything more than to share your feeling of loving closeness. A smile or a light squeeze of your hand needs to be as important to you as having sex. If it is, you’ll be making love all the time.

Romance is a light, airy, free thing born of fancy and fantasy, encouraged by little loving promises and lusty appreciations. These promises are not legal tender warranting payment on demand. If you can allow romance to flourish easily, you keep it alive. If you insist on your rights and what is due you, your account is soon empty.

In the middle of a dinner party you can whisper something naughty in your partner’s ear. The more formal the surroundings, the more exciting the notion will seem. It is also wonderful to make a short and torrid telephone call to your partner during the day, full of suggestions and desires. Leaving little love notes in your partner’s clothing, briefcase, or lunch pail is another way to enliven romance.

Greet such salacious utterings with mock shock, gratitude, and acceptance. Pretend to be offended, hard to get, but make it obvious you are pretending. You don’t want to shut your partner off. Let the anticipation build. Occasionally, during the time the feeling builds, there should be additional remarks commenting on the progress of your growing interest.

If this seems silly or undignified to you and you wonder what has happened to the sexual excitement in your life, I’ll tell you. Your attitude has aged you. It’s time to be playful again.

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