Your Body Talks, Too!

Posted on 02/04/2010

The way you sit, stand, and walk all scream out valuable information about you: whether you are confident, comfortable with yourself, and comfortable with others. So much has been written about how certain body postures mean certain things, but most of what has been written is ridiculous .

For example, years ago it was believed that if people crossed their arms in front of them while talking with you, it meant that they didn’t like you and were closing you off. Now we realize that it could just mean that they are cold and are trying to keep warm, or that they are self-conscious about their breasts, or uncomfortable or self conscious about their body weight.

Because we have become more sophisticated and more savvy in “reading” people’s body language, we have to realize the tremendous impact that it has on others with regard to how they perceive us in the world.

From the way we walk, to how we stand, to how we sit, to how we gesture, people are making decisions about us at every movement along the way, whether or not we like it. These tips are designed to help you move in a manner that clearly spells out self confidence to others.

How to Stand

If we are hunched over, stand on one leg, or rock back and forth, are too stiff or too sloppy and too loose in our posture, we may give off a negative impression of ourselves. On the other hand, if we stand in a manner that reflects our feelings of importance, others will react similarly and treat us with more respect.

Recently there was an photograph in a national magazine that depicted President Obama with all of the ambassadors from the United Nations. The most dramatic aspect of this photograph was that every single person had impeccable posture and stood in a manner that exuded enormous confidence.

One could feel the power emanating from the people in this photograph. It said it all: Powerful people reflect their power in the way they carry themselves. They stand tall no matter how tall, short, or what shape their bodies are in they know their worth is beyond such petty considerations.

In order to stand like someone who is self-confident, which will not oniy allow others to perceive you as being confident, but also will enable you to feel more self-confident, you need to do the following:

1. Pretend there is a string holding up the crown of your head.
2. Visualize that string running from the crown of your head to the base of your spine.
3. Look straight ahead.
4. Tighten your buttocks.
5. Roll your shoulders back.
6. Keep your arms relaxed at your sides.

How to Walk

You can tell a great deal about people just by the way they walk. Some people have aggressive walks, others have wimpy or tentative walks. Some have a bounce in their gait, others shuffle, waddle, or trot. Some even seem to drag themselves along. But the only walk which trumpets self confidence is this.

1. Start with the posture in the “Standing” exercise.
2. Walk at a steady pace not too fast or too slowly.
3. Let your arms move freely and swing naturally as you walk.

How to Sit

Just as it is important to stand properly, it is equally important to sit in a manner that exudes confidence at all times.

1. Stand in front of your chair and let your calves touch the seat of the chair.
2. Next, bend and place your buttocks all the way back in the chair.
3. Then, sit and lean your back against the back of the chair. By placing your buttocks all the way back in the chair first, you will notice that your spine will straighten automatically as it rests against the back of the chair. Doing this also prevents you from slouching.
4. Roll your shoulders back and relax your arms. You may either rest your arms on the arms of the chair or place your hands in your lap.
5. Keep your head up. Visualize a string holding up the crown of your head. This will also help you to keep your eyes focused at the eye level of the person opposite whom you may be sitting.
6. If you feel yourself slouching or sitting sloppily, just remember to push your buttocks all the way back in the chair. Lean against the back of the chair and keep the crown of your head up.

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